A reason to live
by Cullen-girl5288
Summary: He shattered my heart, left me broken, and tore me apart...then I find out I'm pregnent. What a shock. First Fic, Please read, is better than it sounds!
1. Chapter 1

"Okay your all set to go miss Swan." Dr. Casalow told me. "Thank you." I siad giving him a small smile and grabbing my clothes from the chair beside me. It was a girl, I learned only a few minutes ago. What was I going to name her? I to myself as I put my shirt on. I'd have to think of something.

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I thought about baby names as I washed y dinner dishes. I wanted something unique I desided. After a long while of thinking it over, I finally desided on one.

Serenity Cameron Fae. I thought it was unique, I liked it a lot.

The next morning I woke up with sun in my face. Wow, a sunny day, how rare. I thought as I got out of bed. I dressed in a white skirt, and dark blue Maternaty shirt. I went strait to the kitchen, getting a bowl and spoon, and then grabbing the cereal and milk.

Just as I was finishing, I heard a knock on the door. "Just a minute." I called from the table, getting up and putting my bowl in the sink. I opened the front door, and wasn't in the least bit surprised to see my bestfriend Angela Weber in my doorway.

"Hey Angela, How are you?" I asked as I motioned for her to come inside. "Hi Bella. I'm good. You?" she smiled as she took her coat off and layed it over the back of a chair. "I'm Good. found out that I'm going to have a little girl." I said, a huge smile on my face as I looked down and patted my belly. "Oh wow! Congrats! Have you come up with any baby names yet?" She asked eagerly as she sat down. "Thanks, and yeah, I came up with one last night that I really like." I said, pausing to set a cut of hot coffee on the table for her.

"Serenity Camren Fae." I went on, as I sat down next to her.

"Ooh, I like it."

"Thanks Ang, That means a lot." I said with another smile.

"No problem, Bella. Thats what I'm here for." she stated, a smile on her lips.

"Hey, I need to go shopping for stuff for the babyh, now that I know the sex. Do you want to come with me? I'd love to have some company, and another opinion couldn't hurt." I asked, Knowing that she'd love to come.

"Really I'd love to! When do you want to leave?" She asked, all but junping up and down in her seat.

"I'd like to leave sometime soon, I have a lot of shopping to do." I answered with a laugh.

"Cool! lets go!" she sang, Jumping up. "Okay, let me get my purse and we can leave." I said, starting to get up.

"Okay. Do you want me to start your car?" she asked. She was always so helpful, I loved having her around. "Yes please. My keys are in my coat." I called to her, Already half way down the hallway.

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"What do you think of this one?" Angela asked, holding up a pink and frilly dress.

"No, I don't really like pink. I'm more into blue, orange, and green." I stated cringing at the thought of my daughter in something pink and frilly.

"Oh yeah, I forgot, Sorry."

No, no. Its okay, I'm just glad your here, I'd hate doing this alone" I smiled at her, hoping I hadn't offended her.

"What about this one?" She held up a pretty green dress with little blue flowers on it.

"Yeah" I answered, what a cute dress.

"Okay next stop is Wal-mart I need a carseat, a swing, bassenett, bottles, binkeys, blankets, changing table, and a sling." I said as we put the last of our bags into my car.

"Wow, we still have a lot to get huh?" Angela asked as we pulled out of the parking lot.

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After we got home and got everything inside, Angela turned to me and asked "Do you want me to come over tomorrow and help you put everything in the nursery?" "Umm, I was gonna get some done tonight at least get her clothes put away, but sure, when do you want to come over?"

"You know, If you want, I can stay a while longer and help you, Ben won't be home until tomorrow, He's out of town doing bussiness stuff." She said, Smiling at me.

"Sure, if you want to, you've helped so much today, I don't want to wear you out anymore then you already are." I smiled at her. How was she so selfless and kind? she was truly a great friend. "No, no. I could use the workout, and I'm sure you could use the help since you don't have a guy around to help-" She cut off, looking guilty. But she was right. I was alone, Because Edward had left me in peices, Two weeks after that horrible day I found out that I was carrying his child. Talk about a shock. I tried calling Alice's phone, Planning just to tell her about it, and let her deside if she wanted to tell him. In my opinion, he had the right to know, After all it is his baby. But she didn't pick up the phone, I left a message, but I haven't seen any of them, or heard from any of them either. "Bella where do you want the swing?" Angela's voice broke my train of thought. "Oh, sorry Angela, in the living room please." I looked up at her from where I was sitting on the floor, going through the baby's clothes. "Okay, thats everything." I said, following her into the living room. "Thanks so much for your help today Ang, Your the best." "Oh it was nothing Bella, I'm glad to help, gets my mind off Ben for a while." Confusion shot across her face, but she turned away, trying to hide it. "Is something wrong Angela?" I asked, walking up behind her. "Its nothing, I just keep thinking that Ben is going to ask me to marry him, cause he's been taking me to fancy dinners and stuff, but then he just doesn't. I don't know whether he's to afraid, or just likes taking me out. Its just bugging me." She looked troubled about it. "I'm sorry Ang, I wish there was something I could do about it." I hugged her, hoping to make her feel better. "Its probably nothing, Maybe he's working up to it." Ang tried to blow it off. I let it go.

I went to bed that night, very tired. My day out had taken everything out of me, Shopping usually does that. I crawled into bed, and fell asleep almost as soon as my head touched the pillow.

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A/N Thank you all for reading. This is my first fanfic. Please R&R!! all reviews welcome. ~Disclaimer: I do not own twilight, That belongs to the wonderful Stephenie Meyer!~


	2. Chapter 2

The months went by uneventfully. Angela came over a lot to help out, since I couldn't see my feet when I stood up. I'm over eight months pregnent now, and ready to pop anyday. I didn't know how I was going to raise a child by myself and to be honest, I was scared to death. I woke up early that morning, and decided to get up and get some water. It was about eight AM and Angela usually didn't come over until about nine. I went back into my room, And picked up my copy of wuthering heights. After about three chapters I started to get hungry, and went to the kitchen to get myself breakfast. "Holy crow!" I shouted, my hands were tight on the counter. I looked up at the clock that was above the sink. 8:30Am. After the contraction passed, I picked up the phone and dialed Angela's number.

"Hello?" Ben answered the phone.

"Hey Ben, is Angela there?" I asked, my voice sounded strained.

"She's sleeping right now, Whats up Bella?" Dammit, she was sleeping.

"Umm, can you wake her up? This is important. I just had a contrac-" my voice cut off, due to another contraction. I gasped in pain and reached for the counter to steady myself. Still holding onto the counter I looked up at the clock again it said 8:38Am. Only eight minutes apart...

"Bella? Bella, are you okay?" Ben's voice came through the phone, concerned and lined with confusion.

"Ben, just get Angela up and tell her I've had two contractions, eight minutes apart. I need to get to the hospital. please hurry." my voice broke from the pain.

"Yeah, of course, She'll be there soon." Ben rushed through the words, slurring them together. I hung up the phone and put it on the counter. I walked to my room to get dressed. Just as I was pulling my shirt over my belly, someone knocked on the door. "Come in!" I yelled from the bedroom. Angela walked into my room a moment later, holding my coat and shoes.

"Hey Bella, how are you? Here's your shoes and coat." She looked so worried.

"I'm okay I guess, Thank you." She helped me put my coat on, and then my shoes.

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As I held my little girl in my arms I counted her fingers and toes. Ten toes, ten fingers. Angela came in after that, with Ben behind her.

"How are you feeling?" Angela asked, taking the seat to my left.

"I'm feeling wonderful." I smiled at her and then a thought came to me. "Hey Angela, Will you be Ren's godmother?" I looked at her, watching the emotion on her face...First suprise, then wonder.

"Of course! I'd love to!" She squeled. I laughed at her responce and nodded. I was happy with this moment of joy, But then the vault in the back of my mind (the one I tried very hard not to think about) rattled...My parents, Who had both shut me out after finding out that I was pregnent. My "School Friends" didn't take to well to it either, aside from Ben and Angela. Jessica and Lauren had talked about me, spreading rumers no doubt. I was called a slut, A worthless peice of shit, and so many other things. I ended up dropping out (not that I had that much of school to go anyway.) and I now live on my own in a small house on the outskirts of town.

"Do you want to hold her?" I asked trying to destract myself from those painful thoughts.

"Yes please." Angela sang, Bouncing in her seat. I passed the baby to Angela, her arms making a perfect cradle for Ren.

"She's so beautiful, She looks like you, Exept the eyes." She looked over Ren, counting her fingers and toes just as I had done. I don't even think she noticed that she'd mentioned Edward...Or close enough anyway. Ren did look a lot like me exept her eyes. She had golden yellow eyes (much to my surprise, I'd have thought that if she had his eyes that they'd be green, not a liquid topaz color.) A single tear escaped my eye Just as Ben looked up at me from where he was standing behind Angela. Guessing my thoughts he said:

"Don't worry Bella, You'll do a great job. Edward is missing out on a great thing by what he did. Don't blame yourself. Nothing is your fault." I tried to smile at him, to show him that I knew he was right. But I couldn't make my lips work so I just nodded. Angela elbowed Ben in the ribs and whispered "Don't say his name, she doesn't like it."

"Its okay, I needed to hear that." I looked at Ben and smiled.

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I woke up, It was just like any other day. I got up, took a shower, ate breakfast, and then went to get Ren. Its been about a week and a half since I had Ren, and I feel into this new morning routeen easily. I was just sitting down at the table to feed Ren when the phone rang.

"Hello" I said, wondering who was calling this early in the morning.

"Bella?" I nearly dropped the phone at the sound of his voice. Why was he calling me? It took a few minutes for me to stop hypervenalating and answer him.

"Y-yes. Is this," I had to clear my throat before I could say his name. "Is this Edward?" I asked even though there was no way that I could mistake that most perfect of voices.

"Yes Bella, its me. I was wondering if- if I could see you? I need to talk to you."

"Umm, well..I" was all I could get out of my mouth. Why was he calling me now? Nearly a year after he'd left and wanted nothing to do with me anymore.

"Bella, I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't be calling you like this, I'm sure your busy, I just need to talk." There was so much pain in his voice, it was like stabing a knife through my heart.

"Y-yes Edward, we can talk." There was so much that I wanted to ask him, I had to agree.

"Thank you, When and where do you want to meet?" His voice was rushed, like he was in a hurry.

"Uh, you could come to my place, I'm not doing anything right now." I didn't know why I was so eager to see him. He'd ripped my heart out and left me there.

"Okay, I'll be there soon Bella. Bye" He hung up. I walked to the living room, planning to sit in the rocking chair and wait for him to get here. Two soft knocks on the door woke me, I hadn't realized I'd dozed off waiting for him to get here. I got up to answer it, still holding Ren. I shifted her weight so that I could open the door. There he stood, just as beautiful as he always was.

"H-hi Edward." I stuttered motioning for him to come in.

"Hello Bella." He said smiling. I closed the door behind him, and led the way to the living room, picking up a pair of socks, and one of Ren's blanket. Edward looked tence as I threw the blanket over Ren (I was breastfeeding) and sat down in the rocking chair.

"So, uh, what did you need to talk about?" I asked. My voice was sharper than I'd wanted it.

"I don't know where to begin Bella. I'm sure I've hurt you enough, I don't want to do that anymore." He sighed and looked down, noticing Ren for the first time.

"Who is this?" He asked, smiling at her.

"This is Serenity." I said, looking down at her and smiling. "Your daughter." I added, looking back up at him. he stumbled, and sat on the couch.

"I'm so sorry Bella, I had no idea I swear. I'm so sorry. sorry because I hurt you. Like I could ever not love you." There was so much pain in his voice that a few tears fell from my eyes. He looked up at me and saw the tears. "I truly am a monster" he whispered, pain and guilt strong in his voice. he fell off the couch at my feet, his head bowed in shame.

"Don't ever say that! you are not a monster" I couldn't come to terms with what he had just said. He still loved me? but that didn't make sence.

"But I am, Bella, I am." I placed my hand under his chin, coaxing his face up until our eyes finally met. "you are not" I said firmly. I looked into his eyes, daring him to deny it. One of the many questions that I wanted to ask him bubbled to my lips. "Edward, Why did you leave me?" I asked, trying very hard not to remember that day.

"Because I thought it would be better, healthier, if I left you. I knew it would be so very hard for me to stay away but I made myself. Alice hated me for making her leave, and the rest of my family, I made them all change their cell phone numbers, so that you couldn't call. It hurt so much to walk -or run in my case- away from you when all I wanted to do was hold you and tell you how sorry I was for saying those horrible words to you. Bella, I guess what I'm trying to say is; Bella I love you, so much, and I'm sorry for the things I said to you, and the pain it caused you." he finally finished looking down again.

"What? Edward are you saying that you still love me?" I couldn't make sense of his words. I'd dreamt of him say this to me before but never thought I'd hear him speak the words.

"Yes Isabella, I love you. I'll never stop loving you." Thats when I lost it. The tears flowed, and sobs ribbed from my chest. The baby started crying, caused by my distress. I tried to compose myself enough to calm her down. After a few minutes, it worked. I got up and went to put Ren in her swing when Edward asked "Can I please hold her?"

Of course, Edward." I answered, passing her to him. As soon as he had her craddled against his chest, he looked at her and said "I love you too my little baby girl." His words were so sincere that there was no way that anyone could ever doubt him. "Whats her middle name?" He added.

"Her name is Serenity Cameron Fae." I told him. "I love it. She has my eyes." He noticed, only because she opened her eyes at the sound of her name. "Yeah, I didn't expect that, I mean, green yes, because thats what color your eyes were when you were human, but I didn't expect her to have topaz eyes." I looked at him. "She also has your hair. That didn't suprise me as much." He beamed at me, and his face showed how happy he really was.

"I love you." I said to him. I watched as the crooked smile I loved so much spread across his angel's face, His eyes sparkled with joy. I realized that Ren was sleeping, and so I put her in her swing. Edward and I talked for a while, and then just before he had to leave, he looked down at me, holding Ren again, and leaned down to drop a kiss on her forhead, and then raised his head to mine.

"I love you." He whispered just before he pressed his cold lips against mine. I would have wrapped my arms around his neck, but I was holding Ren. His hands however, wrapped around my waist, one moved to my back, and the other to the back of my neck. After a few minutes of this, I had to pull away, I needed to breathe. He opened the front door, and stepped out, but turned just before he reached the step.

"When can I come over again?" he asked, somehow still unsure that I wanted him here.

"Whenever you want. But can you please bring your family, or if not all of them then at least Alice? I've missed them all so much." He looked at me and smiled.

"Of course. If you want, I'll pick you up tomorrow, and we can go see them."

"Sounds wonderful to me, Come over around 10"00Am and I'll be ready. Did they all come with you or what?"

"No, they are staying in Seattle right now, only because Alice had a vision of me coming here, and I know they want to see you." He looked at Ren and smiled. She had her little fist around my finger, and she was sucking on my finger. "I think she's hungry." He stated. "Yeah, its about that time. I'll get to it in a minute, She'll live." I smiled at my words, and he laughed. "Okay, I'll see you tomorrow, I love you."

"I love you too, Edward. I'll see you tomorrow." I stretched up on my tip toes to kiss him one more time, and he leaned down. He kissed me softly, and then pulled away. He kissed Ren's forhead again, and then was gone. I shut the door, and walked into the living room.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: So sorry for the wait everyone. With my wrist in a brace its hard to type, but I made myself. I've also been busy with work. I'll try to update more often, but no promises!:P I hope you like this chapter! **

Three soft knocks on my bedroom door woke me up. I was too tired to get up and answer it, so I just laid there, figuring whoever it was would go away. Then I heard the door open. "Bella? Love, are you awake?" I opened my eyes to see Edward poking his head inside my bedroom door. "Hmm what time is it?" I mumbled. "Its fifteen after ten." He stated, Looking up from his watch. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't get much sleep last night, Ren kept waking up." I said. "Oh, Thats fine dear. Would you like to sleep longer, or are you ready to get up?" He asked. "A little longer would be great." I stated sleepily, Then a thought struck me. "Come here please Edward." I reached out my hand, waiting for him to take the two necessary steps to reach it. He paused for a minute, wondering no doubt, if that was a bad idea. Then he took a step into the room and closed the door behind him. He took another step, and placed his hand in mine. "What love?" He whispered softly.

"Cuddle with me." It wasn't a question exactly, and I was scared he'd say no, but to my surprise, he walked around the bed, and laid down behind me, wrapping his arm around my waist, and pulling me close to him. I reajusted Ren, so that she was craddled in my arms again, and sighed contently.

"Thank you," I whispered.

"Your welcome." He replyed, kissing my hair. He said something else, but I was out before I could figure out what it was.

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I woke up a few hours later. Ren was still sleeping in my arms, and Edward's arm was still wrapped lovingly around my waist. I turned my head so that I could see Edward. He was looking strait ahead, with a blank expression. "Hi" I whispered, kissing the cheek I could reach. He looked down at me then, and smiled. "Hi, how did you sleep?" He asked. "Very good. I'm surprised that she didn't wake up though. She always does." I pointed to Ren, craddled in my arms. "Actually, she did wake up once, but I Hummed your lullaby untill she went back to sleep. She seems to like it, she was asleep quickly." He stated matter-of-factly.

"Of course she likes it, Its the most beautiful song in the world." I smiled at him, wondering how my life could have gone from broken to perfect in the span of about a day. Well almost perfect. There was still the thought of my former bestfriend Jacob Black. When he found out I was pregnent, he wouldn't come near me anymore. He freaked out, said I should get an abortion (something he knew I was very against) and told me I was worthless. Well, whatever. His loss. I turned my attention back to Edward, to see him staring off into space, or thats what it looked like. I knew this face well. He was listening to someone's thoughts. But who's? Was someone here? and then he looked down to Ren. "Her dreams are full of color. And your face. Its amazing to watch." His tone was wondering, his voice soft. "You can read her dreams? What's she dreaming now?" question after question spilled from my mouth, without enough pause for him to answer them.

"She seems to be dreaming of you, your face, your voice, She's rememebering the first time she laid eyes on you, I'm guessing in the hostipal room she was born in. She loves you quite a lot for such a little thing." He finished with a sigh of contentment.

"So, what do you say we get dressed and go see your family. I'm dying to know how their doing." I suggested, sitting up.

"Okay, sounds good to me. I'll go get Ren dressed, and give you a minute or two alone." He smiled at me, and took Ren from my arms, then left the room. I walked out into the dining room a few minutes later, to see Edward sitting at the table, with Ren in his arms. She was dressed in this cute little outfit that was green and black, and had skulls on it. It was something that Mike gave to me at the babyshower. I went to get my shoes, just slip-ons, becuase that's just the easiest thing I could find. I grabbed my coat, and Ren's too, and walked over to put her's on her. After she was ready, I grabbed the car keys, and headed out the door. Just as I got to the car, I noticed a face I'd rather not see. Mike Newton (who had tried to convince me that he'd be the perfect father for Ren many many times) was leaning against the hood of my car.

"Hi Bella, Where's Ren?" He asked. I looked behind me, Edward was staying out of view of Mike. Probably not the best idea.

"Hey Edward, Come here, We should get going." I said, trying my best to ignore the persistent boy in front of me. Edward stepped out of the shadows, into the gloomy light of the day. Mike coughed, then choked, then looked between the two of us.

"I thought we desided that we were going to raise her together?" he asked. I knew he was going to go there. Probably hoping I'd play along.

"We didn't deside anything mike, You did. And since she is MY child, I think its my choice who raises her and who doesn't. And clearly, I've picked her father." Mike took a step away from the car as Edward walked around him to put Ren in her seat. I walked to my side of the car, and got in. Mike still looked stunned, He was just standing there. As soon as Edward got in the front seat beside me, I started the car. To my surprise

Mike moved out of the way, and let me speed out of the driveway. After a few minutes of silence, Edward finally spoke.

"Nice car, Where'd you get it?" He was watching my speedometor which was reaching almost 85 right now.

"Um, the car lot in Seattle, I knew my old truck wouldn't last much longer, and with Ren on the way, I had to get something. So Angela and I went car shopping. We found this one, it was discounted because someone had taken it for a test drive, and they managed to mess it up, the car dealer said it was the starter, but when we got it to Angela's and Ben looked at it, it was just in need of new spark plugs. it took like thirty minutes to fix it, and it runs great." I finally finished, taking a breath.

"Oh, well how much did you pay for it?" He looked out the windshield, Waiting for me to answer.

"About three hundred dollers. the origainal price was 3,000 but I got them to cut it down because it didn't work. I still can't believe they sold me a mercedes for just 300." Edward's eyes popped as I said the brand name of the car. "Yes, but do you know which make it is?" He was quizing me now, I was sure of it. "Yep, its a Mercedes Guardain. I know a lot more about cars then I did a few months ago. Trust me. I know everything there is to know about this car. I love this car." He laughed at me and then began to quiz me on everything having to do with it until finally we saw the first lights of Seattle, and had to stop, because he had to give me diretions to where his family was staying. Finally after a lot of lefts and only one right, we came to a long driveway, I made it all the was up the driveway, Although I thought I might get old and die first. "How

long is the driveway Edward, it seemed to take forever to get up it." I stated.

"Its almost seven miles long. Anyway, We're here." We rounded a corner, and sure enough, there was a huge white house, with maple trees in the yard. I got out and walked around the car to get Ren. We walked up the front steps, Edward opened the door, and stepped to the side so that I could enter the house. The first Cullen I saw was Jasper, he was seated on a long white sofa, by himself. I smiled at him, and I thought that he smiled back, but I couldn't be sure because he turned his head to watch the other members of his family enter the room. Carlisle was in front, with Esme behind him, and then alice. Rosalie and Emmett were in the very back, holding hands. Carlisle stopped just a few feet from where I was standing, looking between me and Edward. "What a surprise. Alice, how did you not see this coming?" He smiled at me, and I returned it. "Oh I did see it, I just wanted it to be a surprise. Bella how are you?" Her voice was just the same, and she bounced up and down where she was standing. She had a huge smile on her face, and she was looking between me, Ren and Edward. "I'm wonderful. How are all of you? I haven't seen you in ages." I looked at all of them, Taking in there expressions. "Wonderful, We're all wonderful. Our whole family is together again." Esme said, Looking at me. Then Alice suddenly hugged me. "I've missed you so much Bella! I'm so happy to see you." She hugged me so tight that I had to pull away, she was smushing Ren. "Um Alice, please, I've missed you too, but your smushing the baby." She let me go quickly, saying "Oh I'm so sorry, and who is this little baby?" She leaned down to look at Ren.

"This is my daughter, Serenity. Ren for short." I explained. "Okay, but who's the father?" she asked. I looked over to Edward, and back to Alice.

"Um, Edward is." I stated simply. "Your kidding right? I mean, its not possible. is it?" She stood up strait and looked at Carlisle.

"It seemed that it is possible. I'm guessing only because Bella is human. But still. Edward, I didn't know you and Bella-" he left the sentence hanging, figuring no doubt, that Edward would know what he meant.

"The night of her 18th birthday. Obviously I never dreamed this would happen, otherwise I would not have left like I did. But it seems that it did happen." He looked down at Ren, and then gasped. she had smiled for the first time right then, it was the most breathtaking smile, everyone was watching her. She yawned, and closed her eyes, nessling deeper into my arms. and then Alice giggled. "What?" Edward asked. "Nothing, its just that you guys make the most perfect couple, and even better parents. She's beautiful." She looked at me while saying this, as if willing me to believe it. Probably because Alice knew me best, and so she knew that I didn't think I was good enough for Edward.

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"Hey Bella, Will you go somewhere with me?" Edward asked "Ren will be safe here," he added, guessing what I was about to say. "Um okay?" It sounded more like a question, but whatever, it worked. Suddenly he pulled me onto his back, and went racing from the house, and into the forest. It reminded me of the first time I was ever on his back, and that made me wonder where we were going. "Edward, where are we going?" I asked over the sound the wind made in my ears. "Its a surprise" was all he'd tell me. Finally we started to slow down, and broke thru the last of the trees into a meadow almost a perfect as ours, or wait, was it ours? I looked at Edward, and he just nodded, giving me my answer before I could ask the question. He kissed me then, enough to make my head spin. When he finally let me breathe, I asked "What was that about?" He looked at me and smiled before dropping down on one knee, and pulling out a ring. "Isabella, I've loved you since the first day I laid eyes on you, I promise to love you for the rest of forever. Will you marry me?"

"Yes" it was barely more than a whisper, but he heard it, he placed the ring on the third finger of my left hand, and scooped me up in another breathtaking kiss. "I love you" I whispered around his lips. his answering moan was a rush of fire thru my body. We kissed for another few minutes, and then He pulled away. Only one word could have made his pulling away okay. and he said it just then "Ren" Yes, she'd probably be cranky being away from me for so long, I don't think I've left her alone for more than five minutes with anyone, Not even Edward. Instead of carrying me on his back like he normally did, he carried me in his arms. We were racing back to his family's house at top speed. We made it back in about three minutes, and walked in the door hand in hand. It was already pretty late, and we were getting ready to leave when Alice asked "Bella can I come visit you sometime soon?"

"Of course Alice, Whenever you want" I wrote down my address on a peice of paper, and hugged everyone before leaving the house with Edward.

**~Sorry its short. Hope you liked it! please read and review!!~**


	4. Chapter 4

We got back to the house late that night. "How could my life have fallen into place so easily, and quickly, when I thought it would never be perfect again?" I thought to myself as I lay in bed with Ren snuggled in my arms and Edward behind me.

"Bella? Are you still awake?" Edward asked in a whisper. "Yes," I answered back "What's wrong?" I asked. "Nothing is wrong, Love. I was just curious if you wanted to know what Ren is dreaming about right now. Its quite adorable."

"Of course I do, I always want to know what she is dreaming." I answered softly. ''I think she likes her Aunt Alice, She's dreaming of her. There's the usual bright colors, and your face, but Alice is there too... Her wind-chime like voice, and pixie-like face." His words trailed off into thought, And I lay there, thinking of Ren, And Alice, and all of the Cullens. This day was perfect. I couldn't ask for anything more. And with that thought, I drifted into a blissful sleep.

The next morning came all to soon. I was still tired from driving to Seattle and back the day before, but Ren was awake, so it was time to get up. Edward wasn't by my side anymore, so I figured he was somewhere else in the house, Tired of laying there all night, with nothing to do but watch Ren's dreams and watch me sleep. After I got dressed, I went to get Ren from the bed where I had left her playing with her rattle. It was yet another overcast day, with a possibilty of rain. I dressed Ren in a blue and purple Anna Handerson dress with matching leggings. I brushed her hair, -what there was of it anyway- and put it up in a little ponytail right on the top of her head, And clipped a barret with blue flowers at the base of the ponytail, over the hair tie to cover it. I walked into the kitchen with Ren in my arms, looking for something to eat. There was a large plate of Bacon, and eggs sizzling on low in a Cast-Iron pan on the stove. Edward walked around the corner from the living room, and flipped the eggs. ''I was keeping them warm for you.'' He said, Hugging me from behind. ''Thank you Honey.'' I said with a smile. Edward took Ren from my arms, so that I could eat. He sat down at the table across from me, playing Peek-A-Boo with Ren.

''Can I ask you something Dear?'' Edward looked up at me, with a slight frown on his face. ''Of course.'' I answered, wondering what the look was for. ''Yesterday, When Mike said he thought you guys had decided to raise Serenity together, Did you mean it when you said that he was the one who decided that, or did you just say that because I came back into your life?'' This was not what I had expected him to ask, And it wasn't exactly what I wanted to talk about first thing in the morning. ''No, I meant what I had said Edward. Mike tried convincing me several times that he would be the perfect father for Ren, but he kept getting the same answer. It was really starting to bug me, to the point that I was planning on telling him that if he didn't stop with the father crap, I would not talk to him at all anymore. I was relieved when you came back to me, not only because of the obvious reasons, but also because that meant I didn't have to cut all contact with one of my only friends left.'' The look on his face wasn't completely discernible, not quiet a frown, but not a smile either. He was lost in his thoughts, that much I could be certain of. He opened his mouth to say something, but then shook his head and shut his mouth again. ''What were you going to say just now?'' I asked, wondering what he was thinking. ''Hmm? Oh I was nothing.'' his answer wasn't what I wanted to hear.

I persisted more. ''What were you gonna say? Just tell me!'' ''Okay Okay,'' He replied. ''I was just thinking that Mike would probably make a better father then me. Safer, anyway. You should have chosen him.'' I looked at him, a look of utter astonishment on my face. ''What? Your telling me I should have picked _Mike_ over you? Are you crazy? Why in the hell would I do that? Your Ren's father, Your three times the man Mike could ever wish to be, and I'm in love with _**you**_ not him.''

I shoveled a fork-full of eggs into my mouth to keep myself from talking more. The look on his face, I think, was a mix of astonishment, annoyance, and confusion. 'But I'm dangerous! You and Ren are humans, I could lose control and go hay-wire and kill you both. Don't you worry about that at all?'' He asked, Looking at me with piercing liquid topaz eyes. ''No, I don't. Ren is only half human, And you love us enough that I don't think you _could_ hurt us, even if you lost control.''

I folded my arms over my chest, a sort of signal that the conversation was over. Apparently he didn't get the hint though. ''But how can you be so sure? How can you have so much trust in me? I don't have nearly the trust in me that you seem to.'' His questioning of himself just made me more angry. ''I trust you. And I love you. That's all that matters to me.'' I grabbed a piece of bacon, and ripped off a bit with a bit too much force. He could tell I was getting annoyed.

''I've made you mad, Haven't I?'' He looked down as he said that, Looking at Ren so I couldn't see his face. ''I'm not mad, I'm just astonished you could think that. I love you, I trust you, and you are NOT dangerous.'' I got up from my chair and went to washmy plate. Edward stood up as well, But he turned left and walked into the living room to put Ren in her swing. As I was washing my dish, Edward's arms wrapped around my waist. Not expecting this I jumped a little. Edward took the plate out of my hand, put it in the sink, and turned me around to kiss me. This kiss lasted for over a minute, and I wrapped my arms into his hair. Finally he pulled away, and cupped my face with his hands. ''I love you.'' he said softly, looking deep into my eyes. ''I love you too. More then anything.'' I gazed back at his eyes, feeling the warmth of his hands on my waist.

Suddenly the door bell rang, startling Ren, and making her cry. ''You get the door, I'll get Ren.'' I said, Breaking the hug, and walking to the living room. Edward answered the door, to reveal a very exited Alice. 'Hi! how are you! Where is my little niecey Ren?' Alice pushed past Edward into the living room, spotting me sitting on the couch with the baby. ''Hi Bella! Can I hold Ren?'' She asked, sitting down beside me. ''Sure'' I said and passed her off. ''I'm great, thanks for asking.'' Edward said with a smirk, Sitting down on the other side of me. Alice bounced up and down lightly, patting Ren on the back as she did so. ''I thought I would come see you guys today and take You and Ren shopping.'' She looked at me, a huge smile on her face. ''Sure, but what is Edward suppose to do while we are gone, All day no doubt.'' I asked, questioning her plans.

''He is going to do stuff with Jasper, Emmett, and Carlisle.'' She said matter-of-factly. ''Oh, Rosalie and Esme will be joining us for the shopping too.'' Her smile faded a bit, as she remembered my past distaste for Rosalie, and her distaste for me. ''Okay, it sounds like fun.'' I was hoping Rosalie would be civil to me, But no one could be sure until I saw her.

~*~Later that evening~*~

After we got home, I made Chicken Salad for dinner. Alice had taken us to Seattle to go shopping, because there were '_better stores_' there. Rosalie was surprisingly nice to me, And Alice, Rosalie, and Esme went crazy shopping for clothes for Ren. She should be set on clothes for about a year. After all of the Cullens left, I gave Ren a bath, took a shower, and went to bed, very, very tired.

**~Sorry it took me so very, very long to update. I've been so busy working these past months. Disclaimer: I do not own any characters exept Ren. SM owns the rest of them!~ :-D **


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